My house is no longer a friendly environment for a lover of Christmas cheer. I'm like Tiny Tim now, trying to keep chipper and happy despite overwhelming odds. The only problem is that the rest of my house is full of Ebenezer Scrooges. Three of them, to be exact. Not only do I get absolutely no help preparing for Christmas, but I get constantly made fun of when I'm whistling a merry little Christmas carol or stringing up some lights! Don't worry about me, though. There's going to be an attitude adjustment in the form of funny Christmas t-shirts this year.
We have been a family of strong traditions in the past, and I would really like it to stay that way. Unfortunately, they already seem to be breaking away from that tradition, so I'm going to have to break it completely in order to enact my plan of attack. There will only be three gifts under the tree come Christmas Eve, and we're going to open them the night before Christmas. In those packages, are three funny Christmas t-shirts for three Christmas scrooges.
The first of my targets is my lovely wife. She has never been huge on Christmas, but she's always been keen on letting me do my thing with the kids. Now that the kids are against me too, I'm losing her support. Her package of funny Christmas t-shirts goodness will have a shirt that has a picture of Mrs. Clause handing Santa a sack lunch in his sleigh. The caption reads, "The brains behind the operation." I have no real tasks for her to complete besides wearing the shirt all night, but I hope it reminds her of how much I value her support.
What hurts the worse and almost feels like a betrayal is the way my son has been acting. He used to be just about as excited over Christmas' arrival as I was, but it just isn't the same anymore. Since he thinks that Christmas is a little kid holiday, his funny Christmas t-shirts selection is going to be the most childish shirt I can find. I'm thinking the shirt that says, "Christmas is SUPER cool!" There will also be a note saying that he has to wrap the front porch rails with holly before he'll get any gifts on Christmas. We'll see who's too cool for Christmas, won't we?
My teenage daughter is the apple of my eye. My wife and I long ago decided that rebellion is just a part of teenage life, so we're just going to let her express herself however she needs. The result is an angry little girl who wears black lipstick and wants her nose pierced. Her gift instructions within her box state that she has to go caroling with our choir group that evening to at least three houses. She has to wear funny Christmas t-shirts while she does it, the shirt saying "Daddy's Little Christmas Angel." Hopefully, I can break her willpower before she can break mine.
The real kicker about these funny Christmas t-shirts, is that I will be taking their picture ALL night. I'm going to do this project every year and keep a scrapbook for when they are older, maybe even to embarrass them in front of friends with if they really get me mad. Perhaps I'll stop being so mean one day, if they ever show a spark of Christmas spirit again. That's a really big "maybe", though.
We have been a family of strong traditions in the past, and I would really like it to stay that way. Unfortunately, they already seem to be breaking away from that tradition, so I'm going to have to break it completely in order to enact my plan of attack. There will only be three gifts under the tree come Christmas Eve, and we're going to open them the night before Christmas. In those packages, are three funny Christmas t-shirts for three Christmas scrooges.
The first of my targets is my lovely wife. She has never been huge on Christmas, but she's always been keen on letting me do my thing with the kids. Now that the kids are against me too, I'm losing her support. Her package of funny Christmas t-shirts goodness will have a shirt that has a picture of Mrs. Clause handing Santa a sack lunch in his sleigh. The caption reads, "The brains behind the operation." I have no real tasks for her to complete besides wearing the shirt all night, but I hope it reminds her of how much I value her support.
What hurts the worse and almost feels like a betrayal is the way my son has been acting. He used to be just about as excited over Christmas' arrival as I was, but it just isn't the same anymore. Since he thinks that Christmas is a little kid holiday, his funny Christmas t-shirts selection is going to be the most childish shirt I can find. I'm thinking the shirt that says, "Christmas is SUPER cool!" There will also be a note saying that he has to wrap the front porch rails with holly before he'll get any gifts on Christmas. We'll see who's too cool for Christmas, won't we?
My teenage daughter is the apple of my eye. My wife and I long ago decided that rebellion is just a part of teenage life, so we're just going to let her express herself however she needs. The result is an angry little girl who wears black lipstick and wants her nose pierced. Her gift instructions within her box state that she has to go caroling with our choir group that evening to at least three houses. She has to wear funny Christmas t-shirts while she does it, the shirt saying "Daddy's Little Christmas Angel." Hopefully, I can break her willpower before she can break mine.
The real kicker about these funny Christmas t-shirts, is that I will be taking their picture ALL night. I'm going to do this project every year and keep a scrapbook for when they are older, maybe even to embarrass them in front of friends with if they really get me mad. Perhaps I'll stop being so mean one day, if they ever show a spark of Christmas spirit again. That's a really big "maybe", though.
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